I admit with a certain amount of wicked pride that I am a survivor. I can…and do get by. Sometimes the problem with just getting by and surviving is that one must kick his heart with its desires to the curb. Unfulfilled desires become chafing burdens. I have become very proficient in the art of separating my heart from things and people that disappoint me and thwart my desire. The walls go up. They are carefully crafted and erected with bricks of anger and hopelessness. I am safe within my stronghold.

The gospels of the New Testament provide snapshots of the life and times of Jesus Christ. In many of these “pictures” Jesus of Nazareth between the lines asks the question of people he encountered, “What do you want?” No one ever said, “I just want to get by,” or “I just want to survive.” People wanted healing, they wanted resurrection, they wanted miracles! The cripple at the Pool of Bethesda had gotten by, he had survived for thirty-eight years waiting for the water to stir. The woman at the well had gotten by, she had survived through many failed relationships. People blind from birth, leprous, crippled, and grieving seem to have met the Messiah by some chance encounter. Was it really chance? Is it possible that there was some behind the scenes divine orchestration preparing the stage? Behind my walls I realize my imagination is fading. I am losing hope.

Jesus offered people life both abundant and eternal, not just for the remote and nebulous sweet by and by but right now….today….in this moment. “Tell me want you want?” I WANT MORE THAN THIS! I am tired of catching the aroma of the food at the supper table…..I want to eat. I am sick of this life of getting by on teaspoon fulls. I want more than survival. I am tired of being hungry. I want lavish abundance. I am weary of this trail of bread crumbs. There…it’s out…I want what I don’t have. Am I too demanding? Are my expectations unreasonable? Have I turned divine promises into debts that are owed to me?

“Now, tell me what you really want?” Give me a momentary glance through the window of your banquet hall. Let me see all of those you have given me raising their glasses and voices to the savior King. I will walk away into the dark night knowing my life was lavish, was abundant and good. I couldn’t reasonably ask for more.

“Now step over the edge of reason and tell me what you really want.” I want to celebrate at your table too…with all those you have given me! I want to experience them in the way you always intended them to be! I want it all! I want nothing less than everything!