There some people in my life who have established a no fly zone…a no loitering sign….a no trespassing warning around the topic of their heart….their inner life…their life before God. I do my best to respect the boundaries that others have established especially as it pertains to their personal or private stuff. However, I do so enjoy walking up to the fence and engaging them on the edge of where I’m permitted to be. One has to be very careful not to violate the sanctity and security of the boundary otherwise the meetings at the fence line are suspended. I have found that people experience an awkwardness or embarrassment as it concerns their private issues as though their difficulties were somehow unique. My opinion is that there are lies circulating through the air conditioning ducts of their inner life that have existed so long that they feel true.

“This person will abandon me if they knew that….”

“This person will not love me if they find out that I struggle with….”

“This person will think less of me if they knew that…”

Let’s go a bit deeper….as it concerns my children. I have been abundantly blessed with a lot of them. I have one who years ago told me…point blank…exact quote… “I am not talking about my heart with you.” Over years of time and some life experience that is no longer true of that one. I have children who speak to me almost daily. I have some who gravitate more to their mom. I have one who is lost to us both. I have had conversations with adult and semi-adult children who confessed to me and their mom stuff that….stuff that can never be unheard….brutal stuff….potentially life ruining stuff. I have learned through those circumstances….this is very important….that with those confessions there was always an unspoken and underlying question, “Do you still love me….want me….accept me?” How well did I address the real issue….the question of love? I’ve had some good moments and some bad ones. I think it’s a bit difficult and maybe impossible to always broadcast a message of love and acceptance to someone who has just broken my heart.

Let’s go deeper still. Once upon a time I had a conversation with God. I asked him to give me a mind like his….a heart like his. I asked him to make me like he is. This is what God did. He gave me children. If I verbalized his answer perhaps it would go something like this: “So you want to be like I am. Here’s six kids because lesson number one in becoming like me is learning what it feels like to be me.”