“The bit of light that has kept me from walking away from this entire series of unpleasant events was the hope that maybe it was about more than just what I had to learn.” KMW

The original 12 lived with Jesus on intimate terms for his entire ministry. Why did Jesus not try to correct his disciples’ flaws? He would have surely succeeded. I mean, He was God, why did He not “help” them in this way? At the end of His life one betrayed Him, another cursed Him and denied even knowing Him, and the rest fled and hid. People flee and hide because they are afraid. Why is it that after such a close association with His disciples did Jesus leave them with their fear? Was His love for them somehow inadequate? The gospels only give us a snapshot of the life and times of Jesus. John said that if all the wonderful things Jesus did were written down the world could not contain the books that would be written. The disciples walked with Jesus through all of the wonderful things he did, not just the things we read about in Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John. With so many good deeds to His credit, why did Jesus not “fix” his closest followers? That question logically leads to my next one. As a result of their association with Jesus, and since His goal apparently wasn’t to fix them, how were the disciples changed? If I were a disciple of Jesus during His ministry on planet Earth, how would I be changed? What if I camped under the stars with Him? What if I broke bread with Him? What if I cruised the stormy seas with Him? What if it were my feet that He washed? What if it were my eyes that saw Him suffer and die? What if it were my fingers that pressed into the wounds in His resurrected hands and side? What if it were me that watched Him ascend out of sight into Heaven? You would think that after such a series of experiences my silly fears and weaknesses would have been corrected by the only One with the power to change me. I have to conclude that Jesus left His disciples exactly as He intended. Would anyone deny that He loved them well? Loving another well may not include much of what we have attached to it. Remember what Paul said about weakness? “When I am weak, it is then that I am strong.” Weakness must be a necessary criteria for us. Could it be that freeing His disciples from fear would rob them of something important? It seems to me that Jesus placed much value on the process of becoming free.

Perhaps I should change my thinking. My heart tells me to stop equating weaknesses with flaws. The obvious weakness in you that I want to help you correct may be the thing that God uses to bring Himself glory. Try this: What if it wasn’t David who faced the giant Goliath? What if it was Samson who defeated Goliath? Which match provides God with the most glory? Do you think it’s possible that loving people doesn’t include burdening ourselves with the task of correcting what we view as flaws in them? What if we were free from that? I’m not suggesting that we wink at or turn a blind eye to the stuff that grieves us in the life of another. Choose what you want to be, either the judge who decides what change is necessary or the influence and instrument of another who changes others as it glorifies Him.

Caleb